Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Saying Goodbye

As evidenced by all of these lovely pictures, this has been quite the summer. After such an exhausting year of teaching, it's been nice to have a break and to finally be able to catch up with some of the friends I neglected during the year.  In short, I've been starting my summer mornings with yoga, and finishing my nights with my friends.  It really has been pretty great.

At the beginning of summer, it always seems like it will never end--August always feels so far away. When vacation started, I had this mental bucket list of things I wanted to do before I left for Korea.  I wanted to spend way more time at the beach, hiking, and taking other random day trips, but it is somehow already my last week in NH.  I am grateful that I did get to take some fun trips, but summer is never quite long enough to accomplish everything. 

I've also had to come to the realization that there are a lot of people I won't be able to see before I leave. In fact, I really only saw a small handful of the lovely people I wanted to spend time with before I left. I think I wanted a "perfect ending" to my time in NH, but I 'm realizing this week is going to be more stressful than anything else (and to be fair, that is my fault for over-committing myself).

Saying goodbye is exhausting.  I think I've been pretty good at avoiding goodbyes thus far, but there have been a few occasions where it's really hit me. Let me just say it's really awkward to randomly start crying out of nowhere in the middle of the bar on a Friday night. I'm not looking forward to having more of those awkward type of moments over this next week. Thank God for the internet/Skype, because I think it would be way harder to leave if it weren't for the technology we have readily available.

I am beyond thankful for my friends and family.  I know that some people move abroad when they are discontent with their lives--when they just want a fresh start from whatever they've been dealing with.  However, over the past year I was more content with my life than I ever was in college, and it makes me sad to leave that behind-- especially since I have no idea whether or not I will actually be happy with my life in Korea.  It really is the ultimate gamble.

But as I get older, I'm realizing (and becoming more comfortable with) the idea that life is always changing--even from day to day, we are not the same people--our friends, families, experiences, and opportunities continually change. I have no idea what my friends and family will be like in a year from now, but I know they will be different.  But so will I.  And I'm ok with that.  

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